Interview With An Aussie

The late love of my life, Steve Irwin was an Aussie and it occurred to me just how little I actually know about his country other than what I’ve seen in the movies.


So I’ve invited Molley from A Mother Life over for a little Q &A interview about her homeland since Steve has left me.

I pride myself in helping to bridge the sensitivity gap and share knowledge among people. It's the teacher nerd in me. So you’re welcome, in advance.

Hello, Molley.

"G'day!"

Thanks for coming over today. I have many profound questions for you.

1. Where in Australia did you grow up? What was it like?
I grew up on a farm outside a region town of about 200,000 people. 3 hours drive for the major city in our state. It was a great upbringing, teaching me about life and death and how to be real. I learned to drive at 12 and shoot guns and respect animals, but in a way I viewed them as food. I learned about genetics and animal breeding, which helped me later in life understand that miscarriages are ok and get over it.
I was constantly covered in some sort of shit. We rode horses and motorbikes and dug holes and just ran wild. A great life for a kid. I never worried about the latest fashions or what I might look like should a school friend happen to come by. I really wish my kids could experience that kind of childhood but we're on a different path. They get to see glimpses though. I take them back every year and they become little farals for a month. It's awesome.
 
2. When and why did you move to the U.S.?

We moved here in October 2005, The King full of conquering the world drugs and me with a pallet of tissue boxes for the tears. The fear of bringing a country girl to live in the city was more than I could stand and I bitched and moaned and cried for 3 months. Then like all good Australian Country women, I got the fuck over it and learned to make it work.  
We came because we've reached critical mass in our company in Australia. Growth was no longer something we could do. The population doesn't allow it. Of course the plan was to move to America and make a killing on selling jingles to clients for radio and tv advertising, which was what we did in Australia. Coming on the success of winning the world's best Jingle competition, we arrived to an industry which decided jingles were out of vogue and so the reinvention began. We've, well the King has been reinventing ever since. It's fun. Every time I get my head around what he does for money, he changes it.. Way to keep it fresh ....yes?
3.  What's that instrument, the dijiter..something? How often do you play yours?

Darling it's a didg-er-ee-doo, a traditional Aboriginal instrument made from a  hollowed out log, usually done by burning. Quite a clever thing. They use this instrument at their cooroberees (piss ups) along with their music claps sticks (which probably have a name but we call them 'abo sticks')... wrong on so many levels but whatever. Although we've owned both of these instruments... it's for show off potential and have no skill whatsoever in playing them. You need to have circular breathing for that and if you think Im' gonna admit to that then forget it. The King would forever insist I circular breath while sucking on ............ never mind, sorry.  Short answer: I don't play the didgereedoo :)

4. What do Australians eat besides Outback bloomin’ onions and kookaburra wings?

witchety grubs, drop bears, and wanengatta bush chooks! 
Ok seriously WTF is a bloomin' onion anyway? That is not something we eat at all. I can tell you why it was invented though, because it looks like a warratah, the New South Wales state flower...  Just for the record, the only thing authentic about Outback Steak house is the Aussie stuff hanging on the walls and the beer. The beer is real.
We eat KFC, Maccas and have been known to throw back the odd slice from Pizza Hut! 
We're not scared to eat Emu or Kangaroo but it's not everyday eats...And seeing as both those animals are on our National Emblem, it'd be like Americans eating Uncle Sam or the Bald Eagle. It's a tourist thing. You can also eat Crocodile.
5.  How do Australians REALLY feel about Nicole Kidman?
I think we're pretty proud of her. She's married to Keith after all ... bitch. 

6. Does everyone have a boomerang? My boomerang doesn't actually work. Can you help?
Sure! We have boomerang throwing classes at school, just after witchety grub cooking and fire lighting class!  
No but seriously We do have boomerangs and they are bastards for coming back. They are a traditional hunting tool the Aboriginals had for killing 'roos and other game. There is a knack and I learned it as a kid but I can't do it. But they are fun to decorate in the kits you can buy :P 




7. Australian animals are way funnier and cuter than US animals. Why is that? 
God was stoned by the time he got to us? There we so many leftovers and he was sick of building? Who knows. Cute they may be but they can cause serious harm. A kangaroo can gut you with his hind legs, Koalas bite, as do wombats. 
Click here for that story. 

 Dingoes eat babies...and the spiders and snakes can kill you just by looking at you!

8. Do you use Aussie hair products? What’s the big deal?
To put some roo in you do! Who doesn't want that?  

9. Do Australians prefer kangaroos or wallabies?
Hmmm, well wallabies are cuter but in the wild they are all pests and cause farmers problems. A wallaby will do less damage to your car when you hit it, so lets go with them.

10. Do people in Australia ever name their kids Joey?
yep. idiots :) How you doin'?

Bonus Question: What do you miss most about Australia?
I miss a lot actually, the feeling of belonging. I'm a weirdo over here but I can spot an Aussie at 100 yards! I seek them out.. I'll go talk to a stranger just cos he's an Aussie.
I miss the foods, I miss being close to family. I miss the humour... I miss the weather and driving on the left :) 

Thanks, Molley! I can't wait to hear more about Australia straight from an Aussie's pie hole. The truth is, I love hearing great stories from interesting people. Because boring people put me to sleep.

I’ll be posting more of my Interview With An Aussie soon.
I hope you’ll pop on over to A Mother Life for more from my fellow transplant and blog friend. 
She's an Expat Blogger too. You can vote for her by clicking below. 
Steve would thank you.


XOXOXO, Mates!
Love, 
Lucy

30 comments:

  1. HA ! That was fun! I love answering questions about Australia...

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  2. This is awesome. You gals are hilarious. I'm totally stealing that joke about the boomerang...I mean stick. And Nicole totally sucks for stealing Keith...although he's way too short for me...and for her really ;)

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    1. Thanks, Jen! Molley is a hoot! Oh, I have many MANY more lame jokes like that. ;-)

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  3. LOL!! That was awesome!! "witchety grubs, drop bears, and wanengatta bush chooks"...yumm!! I'm coming over for dinner!! :P

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    1. I know. She nailed it! Wait until I ask her the question about which way the water goes down the drain!

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    2. Listen you haven't eaten until you've tried wanegatta bush chooks!

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  4. Hey you gals...did you know that Crocodile Dundee was on TV way up north here in Canada last week? Just sayin...

    Great post. Now I'm really an Aussie expert. You know. Between reading this and watching the movie again, twenty-something years later. Can I be an honorary Aussie?

    G'day.

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    1. Honorary Aussie. You just might have something there! Can I be an honorary Canadian? <3

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  5. Crikey! I've always wanted to go to Australia. My lifelong dream has been to hold a koala. RIP Steve. He was great, wan't he? Can't look at a stingray the same way again.

    Hey Lucy - my Monday hop is still open, so hop on in anytime if you want. Would love to have you!

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    1. Sweet! I will...hop on over. lmao! Thanks for the invite. ;-) I honestly bawled when Steve died. That sucked ass.

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    2. "Crikey! I've always wanted to go to Australia"......And there it is, always the first thing people say.... ALWAYS, told you Lucy..

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    3. I KNEW you'd catch that! lmao! I'll share your 3 things ppl say to you next!

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  6. Yeah, I know you lot were all quite smitten with Steve Irwin, but we never really were that taken by him. When tourists used to tell me they were going to see Australia Zoo (his place) I'd just think "Please stop encouraging him".

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    1. Oh, that's actually pretty funny! Don't encourage him. lol! I might have to do something with that! t-shirt?

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  7. I read "on a farm" in an Australian accent. So, of course, that snowballed into, "on a farm, oh my goodness me!" And now I have a damn Wiggles song stick in my head. Until it leaves, I will be referring to Molley as Captain Feathersword.

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    1. The fucking Wiggles!?! How did I forget them!!!

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  8. "God was stoned by the time he got to (you)?" Laughing out loud. And what the hell are drop bears?
    Hahaha
    Visiting from TALU :)

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    1. LOL! I have NO idea! Molley?

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    2. Well Koalas get stoned on the eucalyptus oil in the gum leaves... sometimes they fall hence 'drop bears'

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  9. So glad to know more about A Mother Life; what are drop bears???

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  10. That was hilarious! The questions were genius and awesome and I can't see because I am crying from laughing so hard.

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    1. Awww. Thanks for stopping by. ;-) We have more.

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  11. "Do people in Australia ever name their kids Joey?

    yep. idiots :) How you doin'?"

    So great... A Mother Life - so glad to get to know you! Lucy - beautifully done!

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    1. Geez. Thanks! Molley is pretty damn fun to work with. Even though she compared me to a lemur. On crack.

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  12. I loved this so much. I have to admit to a bit of Ozzie obsession (and I don't mean Osbourne). When my close friend was dating a girl from Australia, I think I asked her every one of these questions... along with some Steve Irwin and some Paul Hogan related ones. It's awesome to have someone who's open to answering questions about their home, isn't it?!

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    1. I loved it! It was the most fun I've had in a while! Sad. It's sort of fun to poke a little fun at how little we really know too. :-0

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  13. Hi-larious!! Especially that part about food, I spit coffee on my laptop. What better way to start my morning then with two of my favorite broads?

    -The Insomniacs Dream

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Well HELLOOOO! I LOVE comments SO much! And don't forget to come back soon. xoxoxo Lucy

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